Why I’m PROUD to be a working mom

It seems like anytime you go, well, anywhere these days, moms are being criticized for something. Whether its breastfeeding, discipline, family diets, kids clothing, or something entirely different, being a mom can be tough. And not for reasons you may think.

One of the biggest arguments I see out there is the stay-at-home mom vs. working-mom debacle. Now I am not going to take sides on any of this today, so if you’re here for support for your side of the argument, I’m sorry, but this article probably won’t help you.

Honestly, I don’t think that one ‘type’ of mom is any better than the other. I think that families do what they have to in this crazy world, and whether that means they stay at home to bring in additional income, or stay home to provide personalized daycare, ultimately the choice is made with their family, which is the way it should be.

I know some rocking stay at home moms who do things that I could never even begin to dream of. Honestly, I feel like sometimes it’s a miracle my kids make it out of the house with their hair brushed and matching outfits. But seeing as how they’re 2 and 4, luckily fashion isn’t a high priority for them right now. We’ve been doing this for a while now though, so luckily we’ve got a pretty good system down.

I have worked since three months after my daughter was born. Maternity leave ended and that was that. Thankfully, I am a teacher, so while I work really hard during the school months, I do get some pretty great vacation time. But, when summer ends, it’s back to school and back to work, for mommy.

And while I would LOVE to have the chance to stay home with my children full-time and become that amazing Pinterest mommy with the beautiful home, and perfectly balanced meals, and all that jazz, I’m also really proud to say that I am a working mom. Here’s why:

  1. I’m teaching my kids the value of a hard day’s work – as a teacher, I see lots of kids. Whether they are my students or not, on any given day, I run into at least 300 students in one shape or form. It is really easy to see which students have a work ethic instilled in them. And unfortunately, that’s not something you can teach in one lesson. It’s learned by example. By showing perseverance and dedication. My kids know that I have to go to work, and that I do it so that our family can have nice things like food. Even though they are little, they know that mommy goes to work to help our family, and there’s value in that.
  2. I’m showing them that, unfortunately we can’t always do what we want– one of the hardest parts of my days is when I say goodbye to my kids before I leave and my daughter tells me she doesn’t want me to go. On days she’s feeling particularly needy she digs the knife in deeper by asking in her teeny little voice ‘I want you to stay with me.’ This is always met with a huge hug and the assurance that I would much rather stay with her, too. And then quickly followed up by a crisp, ‘but we don’t always get what we want.’ And it’s true. While I would love to be able to instantly provide everything and anything my daughter wants, it’s just not gonna happen. And in all reality, that wouldn’t be what’s best for her. Because that’s not how the world works. Even if it’s just a small daily reminder, this is a valuable lesson I am able to give her.
  3. I’m giving my daughter her own personal example of a strong, independent woman– Women have made great strides over the past decades, but that doesn’t negate the need for strong role models. And while I am not perfect by any stretch of the term, I know the value of independence and personal strength. On top of my day job and taking care of my family, I also find time to chase my dreams and pursue my writing. I want to show my daughter (and son) that if they put their mind to something, they can accomplish it. To follow their dreams, they only need THEIR inner strength.
  4. I’m instilling an appreciation for finding a strong partner in my children- On the flip side, me working also shows my kids how important it is to find a strong partner. Since I’m not able to stay at home and take care of all the house jobs, that means they get split up between me and my husband. Our teamwork to keep our home running efficiently is what my kids are growing up with as their example for their own future relationships. I hope my daughter sees how important it is to find a man who supports her and understands that their home is THEIR job. And I hope my sees how important it is to appreciate his wife and the work that she invests in their life, and who will help her to do it.
  5. I’m providing for my family to the best of my ability– Last but not least, I get the chance to provide for the needs of my family. Some months are better than others, but we always have warms beds to sleep in, clothes on our backs, and food in our bellies. And a large part of that is because of me. And that’s pretty damn special.

So while sometimes I’d much rather stay at home and binge watch Netflix while playing games on the living room floor with my babies, I’ll have to save that for the weekends. Because during the week, I’ve got a job to do.

kids

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What do you think? What ‘type’ are you? Do you work, or stay at home? What are YOU proud to teach your kids?

I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Comment and share below!

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Disclaimer: I want to mention that NONE of these comments are snipes at stay-at-home moms. As moms, we should be building each other up, because hell, no-one understands the shit we go through on a daily basis better than we do. But through all the naysayers and days when I’d rather stay home, these five reasons keep me going.  Because even though it can be incredibly challenging, I’m proud to say I’m a working mother.

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16 thoughts on “Why I’m PROUD to be a working mom

  1. My Mother is also a teacher, and before she was a teacher she worked late night shifts as a server. I enjoy learning from stay-at-home Mom’s and for those who work. I’d have to agree with your point on showing your children to be strong, and independent.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m hoping to join the ranks of mothers in this next year! But I will tell one thing I have learned as I watch my friends with kids (whether working moms, single parents, stay at home moms, whatever): It’s hard work!! I have a lot of respect for mom’s whatever their choice of how to raise their kids so long as they have their kids best interests at heart, and I don’t know of any who don’t!

    I think these are all great lessons to teach by example! Great post and it gives me a lot to think about as I get closer to figuring out how I will proceed when the time comes!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m not a mom but I get it. I get the dilemma. My mom pretty much worked (mostly part time and later at home) since my sister and I were babies, mainly to have extra cash for niceties, as my dad was making a good living (and this was the 80’s where things weren’t so expensive!) She always felt guilty about it, like she wasn’t being a good mother because she was raised to believe that good mothers were stay-at-home moms. But my brother and sister and I never felt deprived or unloved (if anything, the opposite). So it’s interesting sometimes the disconnect between what moms feel and what the kids experience.

    One thing that really pisses me off is when you see these bogus “studies” done about how children behavioral issues are due to working moms who don’t stay at home. How about study about dads who don’t or won’t be full-time fathers?

    Tam

    Liked by 2 people

  4. My daughter-in-law is an awesome stay-at-home mom. I’m so happy they have the opportunity to walk this path.
    I was a working mom, but my husband was a stay-at-home dad. I had the better job with benefits, so it was a no-brainer when my daughter was born and our son two years later. I like to think my working taught my children the strength of women and the flexibility of the family dynamics. They are now well-adjusted adults and I couldn’t be more proud.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I am new to WordPress and must say I love this post! I just wrote a post about being a working mom and trying to breastfeed and how hard it is but I’m still pushing. I struggle because I think of how my kids may be feeling with me not being here but I never think about the great example I am showing them for doing all I can for them. Now that I think about it, I told my son I bought him some toddler wipes, and he was excited that I got him something ( A Necessity) to use. It showed me that he’s happy for mom and anything she does for him and that was a great feeling.

    Liked by 1 person

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